Faces

I'm not sure I can give justice to the experiences I had today in writing. I'll attempt for the sake of sharing my experience.

Today, we took a field trip to the Jewish Museum. I took this image from the internet in order to give you a visual and so that I am able to talk about the architecture without having to also describe it. This is a model of the museum and we are currently looking at the back side. The upside-down U shaped building to the right is where you enter, but on the opposite side than is facing us. When I entered the museum, it seemed like any other museum. They check your bag, you walk through a metal detector, then you visit coat check (Where they also made me check my bag, which means Pete got a nice nap this afternoon, but sadly didn't get to see the museum.) Everything was pristine. We were led through the museum by two of our professors. To enter the museum, you have to go underground. The staircase in the U shaped building leads you to the unique building to the left. Although the majority of the museum is underground.

The image below, also from the internet, shows you the layout of the underground hallways, called axis'. Each axis leads to what the architect calls voids. Before I talk about the voids I want to first talk about the design of the building above ground. One of the professors who was describing the building to us, when we were looking at the exact model above, pointed out how broken this building looks, how there aren't many windows and the most interesting thing, the line portraying the brokenness on the roof of the building stretching from one end to the other. The line is made up of windows, it appears black.

The first void we entered was the Holocaust tower. Although the architect originally called it the 'voided void.' The void is the obscure shape connected to the hallway on the bottom right. As I walked towards the void, the cold draft become stronger. Upon arrival, opening the door to the void, I made out the cement walls form the light being letting in from the hallway while simultaneously being hit by the gust of what feels like an industrial freezer. I stood among many. As the door slowly closed, I slowly lost sight of the classmates that stood among me. Darkness. Nowhere to look but up. A dim light. Its distance indistinguishable, yet unreachable. Longing for the comfort of anthers reaction I looked around, darkness. Not even indistinguishable figures, just nothingness. A void. Suddenly I regained sight. Some entered, some left. As I stood, faces faded to nothingness. All I had was the light. I was physically able to move, but emotionally paralyzed. Faces. Some enter, some leave. My only movement coming from my neck. Darkness. Dim light. Faces. The majority exited, I felt the urge to follow. As I crossed the threshold, squinting, heart in a fog. I realized that I felt as though no one would ever find me if I was ever left in there. I felt the absence. I felt blind. I felt helpless. Even though I was surrounded by many, I was in fact alone. Suddenly I was warm. I had forgotten I was even cold.

The next exhibit we walked to is called the garden of exiles. This exhibit was closed due to the weather. It is pictured on the map above as the square grid. The image below is also from the internet because we could not experience it. I wanted to describe it though because what my professors were saying about it really struck me. From inside the museum, I could only see out the window located at the base of the pillars. If I got close enough to the window and looked up, I could see the trees emerging from the top. My professors told us that in walking through these pillars, one is supposed to feel incredibly disoriented. Not only are the pillars extremely tall, the base of the grid is on an angle. So as you are walking through the grid, depending on where you are at, you are either walking on an incline or decline. One of the professors made a comment about how the grid has no confines, so one is never really trapped, but the disorientation brings on that feeling. She related it to the holocaust, but also said how it could be applied to many situations, in saying that in a concentration camp, one could leave, but then what would happen? And another insight she brought was about the trees inside the hollow pillars. Said they are supposed to be commenting/questioning whether life can come out of such confinement, such harsh conditions. I didn't even get to experience this exhibit, yet lingering on the outskirts impacted me.













The third and final void is on the map as the memory void. but isn't really pictured on the map. I heard loud clashing and clanking. When I turned the corner I saw a bunch of people walking on uneven ground. Naturally I joined in. Upon my first step, at my eyes met my foot on its grounding, my heart froze. Sole on face without hesitation. Complete unawareness. No turning back, I became a part of the clanking. One foot in front of the other. Slowly making my way to the back of the void. Only stopping to watch a peer pick up a face to examine it. Carrying the burden with the face leaving it behind only to bear more. In the very back was a corner of darkness. Turning around I felt the need to capture the moment. It is what you see below. What I failed to notice in the moment that I see now are the shadows. The shadows that are cast in front of you as you walk in and behind you as you walk out. There are faces that can't see our lasting shadow, but they sure can feel its weight.

After the picture I knew a picture wasn't enough. So I took this video. Although, it still fails to do this void justice. 

About an hour after I had left the last void, I was in a completely different exhibit and I looked out the window to see this, void. Or is it? It is full yet empty. Seemingly untouched. It makes me sick to admit this looks like coins. Maybe it just another huge statement being made?

There was more to the museum that these interactive exhibits, but they failed to be anywhere near as impactful as the voids. Although the exhibit on circumcision was entertaining. This ad was outside the building before we entered. I thought it was amazing no only that this exhibit exists but also how openly they could advertise it publicly. I love how an image like this can be used in an advertisement for a museum exhibit because it isn't seen as erotic. And I mean come on, the advertising is genius. I knew exactly what it was about without being able to read the German. This specific ad was on the back of my ticket. 

To end, I leave you with a picture of one of the last things I saw, this tree. In some ways it feels like a body. In other ways, many things making a whole, but to me, a hopeful tree. 

Although it does have an eerie feel to it, in some way it makes me feel hope. I think it's in the unpredictability of its shadow. 

Even in a place with some of the darkest history, there is humor and there is hope. 

Abigial

"Clubbing"

This is the first time living in a city. Technically we are in a suburb outside the city but still close enough for the public transportation. What do you do in a city on a Friday night? Well, most people my age go to bars and go clubbing. Gina, Pete and I decided to do our own kind of clubbing. Why be something your not? I mean, yes, I will check out the bars and clubs a few times while I'm here, but honestly, that's just not my idea of fun. Maybe Berlin will change that.

We started off by going into the heart of the city for dinner to this California burrito place called Dolores. "You're doing it all wrong." I hear critiques already. I know, we are in German and we chose to eat burritos. why? why not?

The atmosphere was really fun, the place was packed! The majority of the people spoke English and the menu was in English. It continues to surprise me how many people speak English here. Last night it turned out to be a bad thing. I was so comfortable that after we had left, when we had to stop and ask someone directions, I asked them in English without even thinking. I felt like an ignorant tourist. We're in a city, there are many nationalities and languages, but from now on, I'm going to try really hard to only speak German in public. It'll be a good challenge. 

The Mexican was a different kind of Mexican, something I hadn't really ever had before. It was good, but didn't knock my socks off. The napkins, however, did.

After going everywhere we intended we just started roaming the city, because you can do that in a city. We had nowhere to go and we walked for about an hour and a half. There was one point when we just started following this group of people, who I assumed to be college students like ourselves, who reeked of alcohol and were all carrying beers. We thought maybe they'd lead us to some exciting new place. After awhile we took a sudden left as the aroma continued on. Our sudden left led to our disbelief, "Is that a soccer field?" I couldn't even answer Gina's question, I just started laughing. It was all too ironic. The game that was going on was between two teams of older men. I'm not exaggerating when I say that they were between the ages of 40 and 60. We didn't plan on staying to watch these older guys play until suddenly one of them knuckled a ball into the lower right hand corner. The ball maybe got 4 inches off the ground. We were both now laughing hysterically with our jaws dropped realizing these men, who were 2 and even 3 times older than us, were a heck of a lot better than we were.

This picture is of a younger mens team playing handball. They were boring compared to the other guys.

In a desperate search for dessert, we came up with nothing. Everything closes pretty early and we would've had to settle for something at either Starbucks, McDonalds or Burger King. So we headed back to our apartment, first we made a stop at the grocery store. We purchased wine, yogurt, wafers, and chocolate dipped cookies. We were embarrassed at our ridiculousness.

We put it all to good use though, well, besides the yogurt, that was for breakfast. What better way to end the night than with a movie?

Although he looks like a bell hop, he makes one hell of a bar tender haha!

Cheers!

Pete & Abbey

The Honor System

The BVG is the berlin public transportation system. It runs on an honor system. You don't have to have a ticket to get onto a bus or tram or subway but there are people who ramdomly ride around and ask to see your ticket or pass. Supposedly these people wear simple clothing, when they become a reality, ill be sure and let you know. If they catch you without a ticket or a pass, 40€. 

You get tickets on any tram or bus or in any station. In order to get a BVG pass though, you have to take a passport type picture and have it fixed to a card. There are photo booths that take your picture for 6€. What an experience to be in a photobooth that only communicates in German on your first few days in Berlin. Not to mention the fact that you have to line your head AND eyes up with the fixed shapes on the screen. In order to do so, I had to find a way to get my face lower yet at a semmingly similar distance away from the camera all while sitting on a fixed stool. Talk about contortion of the neck. The caveat to the picture, which isn't the contortion, is that you cant smile or have your glasses on or have a hat and you have to show your ears. Not only was the act of taking the picture humorous, as you can see, they make for good entertainment beyond the booth. 

We had our first day of classes today. I think that it will be a great semester! When i have my schedule set in stone and we get out of introduction week i will tell more about what I'm taking! For now, I peeped this cup in the kitchen in one of the buildings i have classes in. Crazy, right? 

Late night for Pete & I, dont have class until the afternoon tomorrow, yahoo!

Sending our love, night all!

Ich bin Deutsche?

Pete and I are becoming more familiar with our surroundings. We can already get almost everywhere on campus without the help of the map!

Yesterday we took a different route to the cafeteria (Which has amazing food with the most personable chef. Another blog for another day.) and in doing so, encountered fun, new archetecture and unique exterior decoration. 

That's a lime green building with cows, yes. And its hard to see but the one on the top right has a pig on it. Pete didnt want in this pic for fear of blending in. 

After orientation stuff, we checked out the local grocery store with a couple friends. Everything is seemingly cheap comparatively, although there are different packaging sizes. In Europe, its BYOB, not beer or beverage, you have to bring your own bag. I just use my backpack. 

When checking out at the store, I was the last of my friends in the line with one local behind me. None of us had very many things and there was only one divider thing. (You know the plastic stick that seperates one persons items from another) Because there was only one, all of us had made a larger, very obvious space between our items. You could tell which items belonged to each person. Gina was in front of me and when her last item was picked up to be scanned, I picked up the plastic divider, looked at the space between my items and the woman's items behind me, hesitated, and then decided to establish an unmistakable difference between our items. The woman laughed and started talking to me in German. With not having an encounter with a local thus far and knowing very little German, I froze in shock. All I could do was laugh and smile back knowing why she was laughing. 

I simply turned around and paid for my items. When we got out of the store my friends and I laughed about what happened. Gina said something along the lines of, "Oh my gosh you're so legit, she totally thought you were German." 

A lot of people have told me that I look Norwegian and even German before, but being taken as German in Germany is a completely new experience. I think I am very fortunate to be able to fit in appearance wise, in that aspect I, for some reason, felt honored and even proud, but the language barrier felt like an obligation and even an embarrassment. I purposefully didn't reply out of fear that I would reveal my actual identity. That I would lose the respect she had just paid me. 

This makes me curious about the many encounters to come. If that experience just happened to be a luck of the draw type deal or if it will be a regular occurance. And as my German improves along with my confidence, I am also curious to see how my feelings will change about responding. 

Sipping peach tea bedside about to cash in for the night. 

Cheers!

Abbey & Pete

P.s. Pete found dessert at the grocery store. It also happens to be one of my childhood favorites! 

The New Pod

Apart from some minor organizational tasks, Pete and I are all settled into our new pod. We LOVE it! We live in an apartment with 5 other girls. There are 3 bedrooms, a kitchen and a bathroom. The apartment has beautiful, rustic bones, but is painted and decorated very modern. The majority of the furniture is from ikea. As you can see in the pictures below, Pete feels right at home! And we are both incredibly happy and amused that Tony was in our kitchen.

My roommate's name is Caitlin, she is from Los Angeles, California and is a junior from Bard. We knew each other before Berlin, but just in passing. I am looking forward to getting to know her better and I think we will get along great. Out of the 6 girls living in this apartment, 4 go to Bard, but the two others are from Sarah Lawrence and Clarkson. Our apartment building has 4 or 5 other apartments of Bard students and 2 families. Everyone in the apartments are upperclassmen. There is another apartment building directly behind ours, connected by a courtyard, that houses Bard students as well. There are freshman dorms a couple blocks away.

Before coming, I thought the apartments were located 10-20 minutes off campus. Lucky for us, we are, in fact, on campus. Campus is located in a residential area in the district Pankow. The buildings are scattered all within walking distance.

Today and for the next few days we have orientation. We are getting familiarized with the area, meeting new people, and getting essential things taken care of i.e. doing a lot of paperwork. 

So far, so great!

My bed, is on the right, in case you didn't spot Pete right away!

The bathtub isn't really uneven, I think i was just moving the camera a little too swiftly when taking the panorama!

If you can believe it, our refrigerator is the middle cabinet looking thing. The stove has two burners and there's no oven. It'll be interesting to see how 6 people fit their food into that small fridge. I'm sure that'll be a good picture in the near future!

To my surprise, they taste the same!

To make things even better, Gina lives next door! I'm already finding it great to have such a close friend in which I get to share this experience with :)

Trying Travels

Pete and I made it safely, but not so swiftly. 8.5 hours is easier said than done.  I had forgotten what such a long flight entails. Lesson on day #1, body is everything. 

When I boarded the plane, there was an elderly woman dressed in Russian doll-esk attire already seated in the seat next to the one I was assigned. She was in the isle seat and I was supposed to have the window in this particular section of 2. I pointed to my seat and she gave me a challenging look simply by raising her brows. Not in the mood to cause a fuss, I sat in a seat I wasn't assigned thinking I would eventually get kicked out and the problem would be solved. 

Just after, the elderly women put her head down on the arm rest. It was now clear to me that this woman was struggling in some way. One flight attendant after another began to question her health. Some simply asking, another taking her pulse, eventually deciding her health was not good enough for the journey. They called her son to come get her and assisted her off the plane.

After the woman was escorted off the plane, I moved to yet a different seat, one a few rows behind the one I was originally assigned. The plane was half empty and I could pretty much choose to sit where I wanted. I didn't choose to sit in my original seat because I was haunted by the health of the poor soul that wasn't allowed to stay. I lift up my prayers for her health and hope she is in good care. Little did I know this woman's health would foreshadow how my trip would go.

The first three hours, no problem. Hours four, five and six not so much. I am a 21 year old abled body, why was this plane ride so trying? For starters, I didn't drink nearly enough water before the trip as I should've. They fed us dinner at 5pm and breakfast at 10pm on my body clock. I wasn't really hungry but I ate anyway. When I wasn't eating I was trying to sleep, knowing that I got into Berlin at 7am and would have to stay awake another 12 hours in order to adjust. For all of those who know me, the fact that I couldn't sleep is unheard of. My body ached, I couldn't get comfortable, then I had to pee. I want to apologize publicly to the poor woman who sat behind me as I tossed and turned all 8.5 hours. At one point my back was on both seats and my legs were cross-legged up against the window.
Surprisingly, this was the most comfortable position I managed the whole way.

Didn't sleep a lick, but refuse to let jet leg get the best of me! And although the struggle, Pete and I are gratefully safe and sound. 4.5 hours until I am letting myself go to bed, of course the weariness sets in only after landing.

My body now has my full attention, as it should've from the start. Water. Sleep. Food.

This all seems overly dramatic, but I'm my goal isn't to sugar coat the study abroad experience. Its to share my experiences as they come. Of course, not all was bad, Pete and I did have some fun! :) Not to mention a view of earth like never before. 

P.s. Berlin time is up and accurate! 

Peas-Out

Today is the day! Pete and I board the plane in a little over an hour now. We cannot believe it!

For those of you who don't know Pete, my little green friend, let me introduce you. Pete is a stuffed animal pea, yes, like the one you eat. The girls I nannied for this past summer, Fiona and Isabella, house Pete's siblings in New York. Leaving the pod, Pete is on a grand adventure with me in my travels as I study abroad. This blog is for friends and family, so that they may be able to follow Pete and my journey these next 4 months, especially our precious peas in New York!

For now, we leave you with a picture marking the very start of our grand adventure!

We will miss you all! 

Auf Wiedersehen!

Abbey & Pete

P.s. The Berlin time on the right is currently inaccurate. I hope to fix that in the coming days! They are 6 hours ahead of you Michiganders and New Yorkers.